The wedding

This was a traditional Thai wedding, only shortened to maybe 20% of the usual time due to my highly efficient German friend. The “normal” one could take an entire day. Kade wore a traditional gold Thai silk dress. Her makeup and hairdo was flawless. Ralf seemed relaxed only because he probably did not know what was going on at any given moment. He was just following the flow.

As we sat down, the monks came in one by one, each wearing an orange robe and holding a colorful fan. They sat in a row on the long platform in front of the room and chanted for 20 minutes when the ceremony started. The groom and bride sat on the left side of platform. The parents sat in the front row. For the guests, there was no differentiation like in the west for the bride’s side vs. that of the groom. There were obvious similarities but also quite a few differences between a Thai wedding and a western one. Similar activities included lighting a unity candle, receiving the blessings, having a reception banquet after the ceremony …

Ceremony part I - monks chanting

Differences abounded: The bride and groom stopped in the middle of the ceremony (it seemed very abrupt to me since I couldn’t understand the Thai chanting). Kade and Ralf went to the left side of the room where two round one rectangular tables were placed. They split rice evenly from a container and put it on the plates and shared some other auspicious food items to serve the monks. Ralf held Kade's hand like what the cutting cake would be in a western ceremony.

Food serving during the ceremony

The monks, after chanting, got off the platform and were seated at the round tables and started eating. I guess it was obligatory to serve breakfast to the masters after the very focused blessing session (this was about 10 AM).There was about 20 minutes of break when the monks were enjoying their meal. All the guests left the room and went into the outside hall where tea, coffee and refreshments were served. The photographer was busy taking photos of the bride, groom and the guests. Some gifts were given during this time, the bride and groom happily accepted the gift and even took a picture with the guest, holding up the gift together.

Meanwhile re-configuration of the room was taking place when the guests mingled. The hotel staff rearranged the entire room so the chairs were no longer facing the platform where the monks were seated. All chairs were turned 90 degrees counter-clockwise so they faced the stage on the left side of the room. Here the real ceremony of “tying the knot” took place. The bride’s father put a white headpiece on the groom then the bride. The two pieces are linked by a thread. A bindy was dotted onto the foreheads for good luck.

Ceremony Part II - tying the knot and Dotting the bindy

The guests, starting from the parents then close relatives then last but not the least even the clueless foreigners were ushered up stage to greet and congratulate the newly weds. The procedure went as the following: take the pot from one of the bridesmaids, pour the water over the groom and bride’s hand, walk off the stage from the right side, and congratulate the parents of the bride and groom. Mike and I held the pot together and poured water slowly over Ralf’s palms. Kade was smiling sweetly as we poured water over her hands. We wished them “Best of luck”. On my three inch heels, I was very concerned of falling off the stairs screaming and making a bloody fool of myself in front of the very composed audience. Everything went in motion in peace and perfection. Nobody fell on their face... When I got back to my seat, I whispered to Katja about my “fear”, who told me that she was also completely nervous.

Pouring water for good luck

At this point, the ceremony adjourned and the guests moved to a banquet hall for the feast. The prime mister of Thailand also showed up and sat in the front center table just next to ours. We noticed that ours was the only table served wine, probably because of the Europeans, who instead of letting the wait staff serve by glass, insisted on keeping the bottle at the table.

Ralf and Kade accepting a wedding gift from the Thai Prime Minister

Ralf made a simple toast in English. Kade did one in Thai and English. The Prime Minister also made a toast. He seemed like a very nice man. There were at least three hundred people at the banquet. A band played Beetles on stage. Ralf and Kade even cut the cake, which we later found out was fake on all levels for show, except for a tiny triangular spot where a real piece of cake was lodged in surrounded by its plastic counterpart and was used for the “cut the cake” procedure.

Light the candles on the cake

The morning after the wedding, we took off, taking fond memories with us back to the States.

Thai Kickboxing

I did not even think about this until Ralf walked into the hotel restaurant when Mike and I got back to Bangkok from Chiang Mai. I asked Ralf what the next night's plan was. He said dinner at the hotel as more people would arrive but Tero and his wife Katja would go to a Thai kickboxing match. Mike's eyes lit up instantly: "I'd go!" Frankly I had no interest whatsoever to see people beat the crap out of each other. I never liked boxing. I even fell asleep at the UFC match in Vegas when I took Mike on a surprise trip for his birthday. But I would never pass on any opportunity when traveling especially since I was in the birth place of Thai kickboxing.

Lumpinee Stadium is situated right outside the metro. After a whole day of tour, we were exhausted and had some time to burn before heading to the match. We had a massage in a street shop first. The stadium is owned by one of the functions in the Thai army. We got in via Kade's connection since her dad was a high ranking general in the army. As we went to the gate, ushers wearing badges approached us. All we had was a piece of paper with words written in Thai of the person's name and army rank. The usher went in and out came a guy in army uniform. He took us to the side door. We were given schedules of the night, a DVD of Thai kickboxing and a pamphlet introducing the stadium.

The night ahead consisted of 2 unrated matches, two preliminaries, four matches, one major fight and two additional ones for closing. We got seated in the VIP seat in the middle, two rows from the ring. The match was already on. Each fighter either wore red or blue. When they walked up to the ring, their coaches put a weaved head band and a pretty yellow "Lei" on them. The warm-up routine was almost like a dance or a ritual. The fighters prayed to the gods by touching their heads on the corner of the ring or kneeling down and touching their heads to the floor. They moved elegantly and extended their limbs mimicking crane, snake, eagle or tiger. It was all up to my imagination what they were at any moment. Meanwhile a live band was playing right beside us. One of the traditional musical instruments was like the trumpet Chinese played on a wedding day in the old times. They repeated the music the entire night, driving Katja crazy. It was really monotoned and was extremely loud to the point of being annoying but I was quite alright.

Most of the guys were tiny, weighing about 100 pounds. They did not have an ounce of fat on them. Compared to the boring UFC where fighters wrestle to the ground and stay there practically the entire time, the Thai kickboxing was very exciting and full of actions. The fighters moved with lightening speed and were constantly kicking, kneeling and punching. If they tangled together out of exhaustion, they wouldn't get more then three seconds of break. The referee immediately separated them and yelled at them to start punching and kicking again. One of the fights was bloody. One guy got punched in the nose. We all thought it was broken but he kept fighting finishing the five rounds, each lasting three minutes and in the end defeating the opponent.

Even though I had total respect for these fighters and was "wowed" by their techniques, it was a little too brutal for my taste. Overall it was a good experience but I would not do it again.

The Long Neck

I've seen pictures of the long neck women. I always thought with that many rings around your neck, you are bound to have a really LOOOOOOOOOOG neck. I was surprised to hear Poi say that the neck was not long, it was the shoulder that was pressed down to create the impression of the long neck. When a girl is born, three to five brass rings are put on her. After each year, she gains another ring. From the number of rings around a woman's neck, you could figure out how old she is. For the long neck tribe, the longer the neck is, the more beautiful you are.
The end of the first day in Chiang Mai, we went to visit a village of five tribes. A lot of these tribe people lived in the border of Thailand and Burma and their livelihood was threatened by the Burmese war. The Thai government settled the families here and subsidized them. In the entire village, I counted no more than 50 families. The tribes live peacefully together, grow rice, vegetables and fruits, raise pigs, and sell handicrafts to tourists. The men hunt during the day while the women weave, cook, and take care of the children. Life is primitive here but sufficient.

We passed patches of rice field. Women were working in the field harvesting under the less vicious sun since it was almost dusk. Poi said every family gets a fair share since everyone worked together.

All the houses are bungalows, with dry leaves on top. The leaves were dried first before stacked together as the roof top. The "roof" is changed twice a year. I can only imagine during the rain season what happens inside the bungalow.
Poi took us to one of the long neck women's house. She was weaving at the "patio" when her daughter was learning. Here I found out that the brass neck piece weighed five kilos. I tried on with the fake which only covered the front of the neck. It was indeed heavy and so long that I had to raise my chin high enough to feel uncomfortable. She was weaving a colorful scarf. It would take her three days to finish and she sells each one for 200 bahts. A hand made piece outside would cost so many times more. I immediately bought two scarves. Looking at the shy little girl trying to help out mom, I had such mixed feelings. There was sympathy because it was unavoidable of the judgement of the modern material world I came from. It was hard to imagine living with such bare minimum. There was admiration. Here was the simple life style that I could never live and be content with. However they looked so sincerely happy, reaping what they sow and not coveting anything else. At that point, I was reminded again why I loved traveling so much - it opens my eyes through different perspectives.

Thai Massage

During the one week trip to Thailand, I had five massages. I wish I could have more. The first massage I had was at D2 Hotel in Chiang Mai. After a whole day of oxcart and elephant riding, I had a herbal compress with traditional Thai massage for two hours. Thai massage was like passive yoga. It was not meant for comfort. The masseuse would twist and turn your joints, press awfully hard on your pressure points, and bend your body the way you thought you'd never make it. Even for me who practice yoga regularly, it was an ordeal. She bent the arch of my feet backward so much I whined in pain. When I returned to my room, I felt that I had multiple bruises on my pressure points. I was sore for two days. However it felt very good.

In the night bazaar in Chiang Mai, there were lots of massage shops. They were right off the street displaying the incredibly cheap prices of different services, such as foot massage, head/shoulder massage, etc. When I first saw people (mostly foreigners) through the glass door, I thought they were such seedy places. Not until I went in one myself in Bangkok a couple days later near the Lumpinee stadium. Mike, my friend Tero, his wife katia and I were waiting to go to a Thai boxing show. It was after a whole day of tour and we had some time to burn before the show. As we got out of the Lumpinee metro station, the first thing we saw was this massage shop. We bargained the price to be 100 bahts for 15 minutes. Tero had a foot massage and the rest of us had a neck/shoulder/back massage. In my friend's words:" It was the two euros best spent ever."

I would visit Thailand again, if not for anything else, for the massage.

11/27-Mae Taeng Elephant Camp

Poi, our guide greeted us at D2's ultra modern lobby 8:30 sharp. The tour we arranged via the hotel originally only included the elephant ride, bamboo rafting and visiting the Lisu hilltribe village. I wanted to see the long neck tribe so we added extra to the day's event.

The first stop was the orchid and butterfly farm. Poi said it had over 500 species of orchids. The orchids were hanging in mid air, roots dangling without being planted in any soil. Water was sprayed on them six hours per day, three hours in the morning and three hours in the afternoon. That was why they did not need any soil to grow so gorgeously. I skipped the butterfly portion of the visit as I could only imagine -- where there is butterfly, there would be caterpillars.

We soon arrived at the Mae Daeng Elephant Camp. It was about 40 minutes away from Chiang Mai. As soon as we approached the camp ground, I was overwhelmed by the stench. It took me a good five minutes to get used to it. Elephants, young and old were walking, sitting or rolling their trunks to reach for the bananas and sugar canes in the vendor's hands across the fence. I bought a bunch of sugar canes for 20 bahts and walked towards the elephants. She rolled the cane from my hand effortlessly and was almost too quick for the camera.

The elephant show included elephant lifting the lumber, dancing, playing soccer, shooting basketball, picking up flower basket and putting on/off hats from the trainer's head. The most ingenious of all was the elephant painting. Two elephants each was given the paint brush. Using different colors, they painted branches and heart-shaped flowers. They also signed the painting and one of them said I Love (a heart) U. It was absolutely amazing. Supposedly elephants have great memories. They drew the pictures purely out of memory. It was intriguing to see their huge trunk holding a tiny brush and creating such wonders.

After the show, we went on the ox cart to go to the Lisu hilltribe village in the forest. The oxes were white and strange looking. I always thought they would look like a bull but they were nothing like that. Our driver graciously motioned to Mike and gave him the whip. Mike happily crossed over the seat and went to the front to drive the cart. The road was bumpy and dusty. Near and far in the jungle, elephants passed with passenger atop.

At the Lisu village, there were bungalows built for people to wait for the elephant ride. It was like a bus stop except that you stepped onto an elephant. Elephants carrying other tourists would come by, drop off the passengers and pick the next ones up. I was counting down to our ride and thought we'd go on this really gigantic male elephant. But a man in front of us took him. The next one was a female elephant and a bit shorter. We stepped on. The elephant "ride coordinator" snap closed the metal bar (simply a nail holding the bar in front of our belly). Off we went and I almost threw myself off the bar since I did not expect the ride to be so bumpy. We joined the convoy of elephants. I noticed that a baby elephant was following us and it actually sneaked out of the group and went to a Lisu bungalow. He stuck his trunk into a hole of the bungalow and apparently found some food and took it into his mouth. Our rider stopped the elephant and let everyone else pass us. I could not get it until I realize that we were riding the mama elephant. Mom would not move until the baby was around. The rider was yelling at the baby to come back but it was enjoying its freedom. It was quite amusing. The entire ride was a tug of war between our rider and the baby elephant. The mom would stop so she could feed the baby. At one point, the baby completely went to a wrong route and led the mom to frantically follow him into the narrow leafy path. On the way, there were "rest stops" for the elephants - bungalows selling sugar canes and bananas (20 bahts for a stack). Most of the time, before the tourists consent to pay, the elephants already took the bananas with their trunk and put them into their mouth. Too late!! We fed our mom and baby about three times until we used up all the change.